Tourist in Havana

A tourist from the United States of America is at a resturant in Havana. He tells the waiter that the USA is the best country in the world because of the freedoms it has. He says, "Take Freedom of Speech for example. I could stand in front of the White House in Washington D.C. and yell 'President Clinton is a bastard!' and nothing would be done to me." The Cuban waiter replies, "We have that same freedom in Cuba. I could stand in front of El Capital and yell the same thing and nothing would be done to me too!"

Republican Emblem Change

The Republican party announced today that they are changing their emblem to a condom because it more clearly reflects their party's political stance: A condom stands up to inflation, halts production, discourages co-operation, protects a bunch of dicks, and gives one a sense of security while screwing others.

Lunch with Clinton

Clinton and Gore went to a diner to get a bite to eat. A good looking waitress comes up and asks, "Can I take your order?" Clinton says, "Yes, I'd like a quickie!" She turns a little red and say, "Sir, with your wife running for president I don't think you should even be suggesting something like that. I'll come back when you're ready to order from the MENU!" As she walks away Gore leans over and says, "Bill, its pronounced quiche."