Pack Your Bags, I Won the Lottery

This guy runs home and bursts in yelling "Pack your bags honey, I just won the lottery!!"  She says "Oh wonderful, should I pack for the beach or for the mountains?"  He replies, "I don't care...Just get the heck out!!"

Yen Exchange

An Asian man walked into the currency exchange in New York with 2000 Japanese yen and walked out with $22. The following week, he walked in with 2000 yen, and was handed $16.20. He asked the teller why he got less money than the previous week. The teller said, "Fluctuations." The Asian man stormed out, and just before slamming the door, turned around and shouted, "Fluc you Amelicans, too!"

Olympians Donations

American Olympian Picabo Street donated a large sum to her hometown hospital's emergency center. Her town named the center after her: Picabo ICU.