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Holiday Jokes - Christmas Jokes

Chemistry Christmas Song
Quantum Chemistry
On the first day of Christmas, my professor gave to me: An exam in Quantum Chemistry. On the second day of Christmas, my professor gave to me: a double integral and an exam in Quantum Chemistry. On the third day of Christmas, my professor gave to me: three orbitals, a double integral, and an exam in Quantum Chemistry. On the fourth day of Christmas, my professor gave to me: four harmonic oscillators, three orbitals, etc. On the fifth day of Christmas, my professor gave to me: Five Hermitian Operators! Four harmonic ocillators, three orbitals, etc. On the sixth day of Christmas, my professor gave to me: six spin-orbit couplings, etc. On the seventh day of Christmas, my professor gave to me: seven basis functions, etc. On the eighth day of Christmas, my professor gave to me: eight time dependent perturbations, etc. On the ninth day of Christmas, my professor gave to me: nine Slater determinants, etc. On the tenth day of Christmas, my professor gave to me: ten electrons tunneling, etc. On the eleventh day of Christmas, my professor gave to me: eleven photons emitting, etc. On the twelfth day of Christmas, my professor gave to me: 12 fermions exchanging, etc.
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Instagram Post
Q: What do elves post on Instagram?
A: Elf-ies.
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Santa Knows
Q: Why is Santa so jolly?
A: He knows where the naughty girls live.
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