Celebrity

Q: What's the definition of a celebrity?
A: Somebody who spends the first half of their life trying to become famous, and the second wearing dark glasses so no one will recognize them.

End of the Line

Q: What always comes at the end of Thanksgiving?
A: The letter "g"

Nun Attack

A nun tells other nuns about how she was attacked the night before. She explains her escape, "I stopped and pulled my dress up." Shocked, the other nuns ask, "And then what?" "He pulled his pants down," the nun replies, "And then I ran. A nun with her dress up can run much faster than a man with his pants down."