No-so-suspicious Disappearance of a Husband

A woman reported the disappearance of her husband to the police. The officer looked at the guy's photograph, questioned her, and then asked if she wanted to give her husband any message if they found him.  "Yes, please," she replied. "Tell him Mother didn't come after all."

Deportation

I live in constant fear that Trump will deport my latina mother-in-law who lives at 1944 5th Street in a white house with a blue door.  She gets off work at 6PM.

The Government Cut-backs Hit Home

The following conversation took place one morning between a wife and her husband. They were discussing government cost cuts that they recently heard about in the paper. "Steve," his wife said, while reading the newspaper, "it looks like our government is going to cut overhead and trim down the military forces. They are going to eliminate six over-aged destroyers." To which the husband replies, "Sorry to hear that, dear. I'm sure you'll miss your mother being gone."