You Might Be A Redneck 39

You might be a redneck if...

• One of the options on your truck is a spitoon.
• The Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your spouse.
• You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.
• You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.
• You think a woman who is "out of your league" bowls on a different night.
• Jack Daniels makes your list of "Most Admired People."
• You think Genitalia is an Italian airline.
• You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.
• Anyone in your family ever died right after saying, "Hey, y'all watch this."
• You've got more than one brother named 'Darryl.'

Russian Sex

A man is at a bar. He sees a good looking woman, but she's a little older. Maybe in her 40s. He goes up to her and starts a conversation. Halfway through she seems interested and asks an interesting question. She asks how he feels about a little mother-daughter action.
The man is intrigued. She is nice enough by herself, but her daughter must be amazing. He agrees and they go back to her place. They enter the house and go upstairs. The lady knocks on a bedroom door and gently whispers:
"Mom, are you awake?"

What's in a Name

Q: If a person from Holland marries a person from the Philippines, what would their babies be called?
A: Hollapinos