Disability Jokes

Ponderings Collection

- Whatever happened to preparations A through G?
- If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?
- So what's the speed of dark?
- Why don't they just make mouse-flavored cat food?
- I just got skylights put in my place.  The people who live above me are furious.
- Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?
- Do they have reserved parking for non-handicapped people at the Special Olympics?
- Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
- If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?
- Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?

Anonymous

Deaf Sex

Two deaf people get married. During the first week of marriage, they find that they are unable to communicate in the bedroom when they turn off the lights (because they can't see each other using sign language, natch).
After several nights of fumbling around and misunderstandings, the wife proposes a solution. "Honey," she signs, "Why don't we agree on some simple signals? For instance, at night, if you want to have sex with me, reach over and squeeze my left breast one time. If you don't want to have sex, reach over and squeeze my right breast one time."
The husband thinks this is a great idea and signs back to his wife, "Great idea! Now if you want to have sex with ME, reach over and pull on my penis one time."
"And if you don't want to have sex, reach over and pull on my penis......two hundred times"

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

At the Top of the Stairs

Q: What is black and sits at the top of a set of stairs?
A: A quadriplegic in a house fire.

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous
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