Kenny Rogers Bus Crash

Kenny Rogers and his entourage are aboard their tour bus on their way to a concert in Denver, when they get a flat tire. The mechanic jumps off the bus to fix the flat, but because they're already behind schedule and in a hurry, he neglects to double check that the lug nuts are properly tightened. Shortly thereafter, as the bus goes around a curve on a twisty mountain highway, the entire wheel comes off. The bus veers off the road, and plunges down the side of the mountain. Everybody on board is killed, except for a young "roadie" who happened to be lying in his bunk, and was somewhat shielded from the crash by his mattress. The kid is lying in his hospital bed being interviewed by the press, and one reporter asks him if Kenny Rogers had said any last words? "Yes," said the young man, "he did." As the bus went over the edge I could hear Mr. Rogers singing... "You picked a fine time to leave me, loose wheel"...

Sinner Bill

Q: Why do some people call Bill Clinton a sinner?
A: Because he broke the 11th commandment. ''Thou shalt not use thy rod on thy Staff''

Panties

President Clinton was seen walking around the White House one day. Laying across one shoulder was a pair of ladies' nylon panties. Nervously one White House Aide approach the President and asked about the panties. "Oh those, "replied the President, "I'm trying to quit. That's the patch."