Flight Attendant

A 777 was starting its descent and the pilot had forgotten to turn off the P.A. system. ''As soon as I clock off'' he said, ''I'm going to have a nice cold beer and then screw the arse off that blonde flight attendant.'' The horrified flight attendant made a dash toward the cockpit, but tripped over in the aisle. A little old lady sitting there whispered, ''There's no need to hurry love, he said he was going to have a beer first.''

Blonde Obituaries

Q: Where do you look for blondes' obituaries?
A: Under "Home Improvements."

Ketchup and Liquor

(repeat ketchup and liquor after every phrase)

1. What did you have for breakfast?
2. What did you have for lunch?
3. What did you have for dinner?
4. What do you do when a hot blonde walks by?