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Blonde Jokes
Blonde Landing
Q: Why did the blonde crash her plane when landing?
A: Because the runway was only 25ft long, but a mile wide.
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Two Blondes in Heaven
One blond says to another, "how did you die"? "I froze to death," says the second. "That's awful" says the first blonde. "How does it feel to freeze to death?" "It's very uncomfortable at first," says the second blonde. "You get the shakes, and you get pains in all your fingers and toes. But eventually, it's a very calm way to go. You get numb and you kind of drift off, as if you're sleeping."
"How about you, how did you die?", asked the second blonde. "I had a heart attack," says the first blonde. "You see I knew my husband was cheating on me, so one day I showed up at home unexpectedly. I ran up to the bedroom, and found him alone watching TV. I ran to the basement, but no one was hiding there either. I ran to the second floor, but no one was hiding there either. I ran as fast as I could to the attic, and just as I got there, I had a massive heart attack and died. The second blonde shakes her head. "What a pity ... if you had only looked in the freezer, we'd both still be alive."
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Gender Logic
Two brunettes and a blonde are having lunch at a cafe, all three are pregnant. Through out the coversation the topic of sex and pregnancy comes up, finally culminating in each one discussing their respective fetus' and the manner of conception. The first brunette says "I know I am going to have a boy because I was on top." The second brunette says "I know I am going to have a girl because I was on the bottom." The blonde is silent, she has a stricken look on her face, finally she bursts out "Oh my god, I'm going to have a puppy".
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