All-inclusive

An Englishman, an Irishman, a Scotsman, an Aussie, an Abo, a Yank, an African, an elephant, a refrigerator, two blondes, a homosexual, three social workers, a Jew, a crocodile and a kiwi all walked into a bar. The bartender turned around and said, "Is this some kind of a joke?"

Full Fledged Alaskan

There's this guy and he lives in the second largest state in America, which is California, and he want's to live in the largest state of America which is Alaska. So he goes there for a few weeks and decides he wants to become a full-fledged Alaskan, so he goes in this pub to ask a bar man what he has to do to become a full fledged Alaskan. The bar man say's "First you drink this liter of whisky, then you've got to kill a bear, and find a woman and rape her." The guy gets confused, so he asked the bar man to repeat it. He comes back a week later beaten to shit. "What happened to you?" said the bar man. "I'm nearly a full fledged alaskan, all I gotta do now is kill a woman"!

A Blonde Walks Into A Bar

A blonde walks into a bar. Ouch!