Redneck Driving

Rednecks don't let friends drive home drunk, they get drunk and ride with them.

Critical Thinking at It's Best

Woman: Do you drink beer?
Man: Yes
Woman: How many beers a day?
Man: Usually about 3
Woman: How much do you pay per beer? 
Man: $5.00 which includes a tip
Woman: And how long have you been drinking?
Man: About 20 years, I suppose
Woman: So a beer costs $5 and you have 3 beers a day which puts your spending each month at $450. In one year, it would be approximately $5400 …correct?
Man: Correct
Woman: If in 1 year you spend $5400, not accounting for inflation, the past
20 years puts your spending at $108,000, correct?
Man: Correct
Woman: Do you know that if you didn't drink so much beer, that money could have been put in a step-up interest savings account and after accounting for compound interest for the past 20 years, you could have now bought a Ferrari?
Man: Do you drink beer?
Woman: No
Man: So where's your Ferrari?

Come Home To This

This guy, about 40, walks into a bar and orders a drink. Then he pulls out a picture of a beautiful girl, about 20. He orders drink after drink after drink. Finally, the bartender asks why he's getting drunk. "I have to come home to this!'' the guy says, pointing to the picture of the beautiful girl. "What's wrong with her?'' asks the bartender. ''She's beautiful and half your age!''
''Exactly. That's my daughter.''