Skunked Again

Q: How do you stop a skunk from smelling?
A: You hold his nose!

Yo Mama - Chimp Cage

Yo momma's so ugly, they put her in the chimp enclosure to stop the chimpanzee's from jerking off!

Vampire Bat

A vampire bat came flapping in from the night covered in fresh blood and parked himself on the roof of the cave to get some sleep. Pretty soon, all the other bats smelled the blood and began hassling him about where he got it. He told them to go away and let him get some sleep, but they persisted until finally he gave in. "OK, follow me" he said and flew out of the cave with hundreds of bats behind him.
Down through the valley they went, across a river and into a forest full of trees. Finally he slowed down and all the other bats excitedly milled around him. "Now, do you see that tree over there?" he asked.
"Yes, Yes, Yes!" the bats all screamed in a frenzy.
"Good" said the bat, "Because I sure as hell didn't!"