Green Elephant

Q: What do you do with a green elephant?
A: Wait till it ripens!

For 40 years

Two neighbors had been fighting each other for  four decades. Bob buys a Great Dane and teaches it to use the bathroom in Bill's yard. For one whole year Bill ignores the dog. So Bob then buys a cow and teaches it to use the bathroom in Bill's yard. After about a year and a half of Bob's cow crapping in Bill's yard; being ignored all the while, a semi pulls up in front of Bill's house. Bob runs over and demands to know what's in the18-wheeler. 'My new pet elephant,' Bill replies solemnly.

Basketball

Q: How are elephants and hippopotamuses alike?
A: Neither can play basketball!