Cat Quips!

• There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast.
• Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods... Cats have never forgotten this.
• Here's proof that Cats are smarter than dogs... You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow.  
• Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later.
• People who hate cats, will come back as mice in their next life.
• Dogs believe they are human. Cats believe they are God!
• Some people say that cats are sneaky, evil, and cruel.
• I got rid of my husband. The cat was allergic.
• My husband said it was him or the cat... I miss him sometimes.
• Cats aren't clean, they're just covered with cat spit!

Cat Actors

Q: What do cat actors say on stage?
A: Tabby or not tabby!

Golfish Dead

One day Mongo is in his back yard digging a hole. His neighbor, seeing him there, decides to investigate. "Whatcha doin?" he asked. Mongo replies, "My goldfish died and I'm burying him." "That's an awful big hole for a goldfish, ain't it?" asked the neighbor. Mongo shot back, "That's because he's inside your fuckin' cat!'