Old Librarians Again

Old Librarians never die, they just check out.

One Liners - Business

• Just because you are paranoid doesn't mean they are not out to get you.
• Just when you get going, someone injects a dose of reality with a large needle.
• Just when you get really good at something, you don't need to do it anymore.
• Just when you think you've won the rat race, along come faster rats.
• Knowledge based on external evidence is unreliable.
• Laziness is the mother of nine inventions out of ten.
• Leakproof seals will.
• Learn to be sincere. Even if you have to fake it.
• Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.
• Leftover nuts never match leftover bolts.

Psychology Student's Assignment

A psychology student at a local university was sent on a field assignment to evaluate three patients in a local mental hospital. The first patient was locked in his room throwing tennis balls everywhere. The student asked why, and the patient answered, "When I get out of here I going to be a tennis pro." The second patient was locked in his room throwing baseballs everywhere. When asked why he said, "When I get out of here I'm going to be a professional baseball player." The student thought he was starting to get the hang of things, until he looked in on the third patient. There locked in the middle of the room was a naked man, masturbating with a peanut on the end of his penis. The student asked, "I understand about the others, but what are you going to be when you get out of here?" "They're never going to let me out of here," the patient said "I'm f**king nuts!"