Qualification Test

Murphy applied for an engineering position at an Irish firm based in Dublin. An American applied for the same job and both applicants having the same qualifications were asked to take a test by the Department manager. Upon completion of the test both men only missed one of the questions. The manager went to Murphy and said Manager: "Thank you for your interest, but we've decided to give the American the job."Murphy: "And why would you be doing that? We both got nine questions correct. This being Ireland and me being Irish I should get the job! "Manager: "We have made our decisions not on the correct answers, but on the question you missed."Murphy: "And just how would one incorrect answer be better than the other? "Manager: "Simple, the American put down on question #5, "I don't know.", You put down "Neither do I."

Another Dumb Blonde

A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's doing a show in a small club in a small town in Arkansas. With his dummy on his knee, he's going through his usual dumb blonde jokes when a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and starts shouting: "I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of a person's hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community and from reaching our full potential as a person, because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against, not only blondes, but women in general... and all in the name of humor!" The ventriloquist is embarrassed and begins to apologize, when the blonde yells, "You stay out of this, mister! I'm talking to that little jerk on your knee!"

Playing Trucker

A young boy sits on the edge of the sidewalk, eats some M&Ms, cuts off the back end of a grasshopper, and then moves down the curb. He does this over and over. His mother asks him what he's doing. He says, "I'm playing trucker. I pop some pills, cut off some a**hole and keep moving."