Horse Country

A man took a trip out West after a harrowing divorce proceeding. He stopped in a bar, and after a few drinks stated to no one in particular, "Lawyers are horses' asses." Hearing this, one of the locals spoke up:  "Mister, watch what you say. You're in horse country."

Three Most Commonly Asked Questions

What are the three questions most commonly asked by lawyers?

1. How much money do you have?
2. Where can you get more?
3. Do you have anything you can sell?

Crusty Old Managing Partner

The crusty old managing partner finally passed away, but his law firm kept receiving calls asking to speak with him. "I'm sorry, he's dead," was the standard answer. Finally, the receptionist who fielded the calls began to realize it was always the same voice, so she asked who it was and why he kept calling. The reply: "I used to be one of his junior associates, and I just like to hear you say it."