Perhaps

The clerk showed the man the store's most expensive perfume. "This is called 'Perhaps'," said the sales clerk. "It's $285 per ounce." "Listen," the man shot back, "for $285 an ounce, I don't want something called 'Perhaps'; I want something called... "You Can Bet Your Sweet Ass You'll Get Some !!"

The Grocery Store

A young boy had a job bagging groceries at a supermarket. One day the store decided to install a machine for squeezing fresh orange juice. The young lad was most intrigued by this machine, and he asked if he could be allowed to work the machine. The manager refused, but the youngster couldn't understand why not.
The store manager explained it to him: "Sorry, kid, but baggers can't be juicers."

Condom Size Test

A guy goes into a drugstore to buy condoms. "What size?" asks the clerk. "Gee, I don't know." "Go see Sophie in Aisle 4." He goes over to see Sophie, who grabs him in the crotch and yells, "Medium!" Mortified, the guy hurries over to pay and quickly leaves. Another guy comes in to buy condoms and gets sent to Sophie in Aisle 4. Sophie grabs him and yells, "Large!" The guy struts over to the register, pays and leaves. A high school kid comes in to buy condoms. "What size?" Embarrassed, the kid says, "I've never done this before. I don't know what size." The clerk sends him over to Sophie. A few minutes later, Sophie yells, "Cleanup in Aisle 4!"