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Sex Jokes - Prostitute Jokes
Hard Times
A married couple are having hard financial times so they decide that their only option is for the wife to become a prostitute. She’s not quite sure what to do, so the husband says, “Stand in front of that bar and pick up a guy. Tell him that you charge a hundred bucks. If you have a question, I’ll be parked around the corner.”
She’s been standing there for 5 minutes when a guy pulls up and asks, “How much?”
She says, “$100”
He says, “All I have is $30”.
She says, “Hold on,” and runs back to her husband and asks, “What can he get for thirty?” “A hand job”, was the reply.
She runs back and tells the guy for $30 he gets a hand job. He agrees, so she gets in the car, he unzips his pants, and out pops this HUGE member...
She stares at it for a minute, and then says, “I’ll be right back.” She runs back to her husband, and asks, “Can you loan this guy seventy bucks?”
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Prostitute's Runny Nose
Q: What do you call a prostitute with a runny nose?
A: Full.
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State of Mississippi
A guy drives on the highway and sees a sign that says, "Mississippi State Whorehouse -- 10 miles." He decides to stop in. A madam answers the door, and the man requests a whore. The madam says, "I'll need $500 first." The man pays, then asks about his whore again. The madam says "Wait for 15 minutes in that hallway. Go straight, left, straight, right, and then go through the door at the end of the hall." He follows the directions, walks out the door and finds himself in the parking lot. His car has a sign on it that says, "Congrats! You've just been screwed by the state of Mississippi!"
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