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I Wrote It
There was this guy walking down the road when he noticed a night club ahead. He went in, went up to the bar and asked for a drink. The bar owner, who was tending bar, said, "I've never seen you in her before."
The guy says, "Yes, I'm not from around here. I'm just passing through on my way to find a job."
The owner asks, "What do you do?"
The guy says, "I write music and play the piano."
The owner, looking excited says, "REALLY!? I have an ad in the paper looking for someone to play my piano. Please sit down at the keyboard and play for me if you're interested." The guy does and as he plays the piano the owner is in awe of his talent and musical abilities.
The owner says, "You play the piano more beautifully than anyone I have ever heard! What is the name of that song?"
The guy says, "I wrote that song and the name is Two Lesbians Fucking Their Brains Out."
The owner gasps and is taken back. He says, "My gosh, that's a terrible name for such a beautiful song. Do you know any others?"
The guy smiles and plays again. Once more the owner is astounded by this guy's talent and musical abilities. He's almost afraid to ask but he does ask what the name of the song he just played.
The guy answers, "I Fucked Her All Night Until She Couldn't Take Anymore."
The owner again was shocked. The owner says, "Ok, you play beautifully and the songs you have written are incredible. I will hire you, but you have to promise not to tell the name of your songs to the patrons." The guy agrees.
That night the guy was playing the piano and the crowd was just as amazed as the owner was with this man's musical abilities. After playing two songs the crowd stood up and applauded. The guy was really pleased and stood up to take a bow. When he stood up and faced the audience, it was apparent that his zipper was open and his dick and balls were hanging out. One of the patrons close to the piano says, "Sir, do you know your dick and balls are hanging out?"
The guy smiles and says, "KNOW IT? I WROTE IT!"
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Smoke After Sex
Boyfriend: Do you smoke after sex?
Girlfriend: Dunno, I've never looked
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Chain Letter
Dear Sister,
This letter was started by a woman in the hope of bringing relief to other tired and discontented females. Unlike other chain letters, this one does not cost anything. Just send a copy to 5 of your friends who are equally tired and discontented, then bundle up your husband/boyfriend. Send him to the woman whose name appears at the top of the list and add your name to the bottom of the list.
When your name comes to the top of the list you will receive 16,877 men and one of them is bound to be a hell of a lot better than the one you already have. Do not break the chain. One woman broke the chain and got her own bastard back. At this writing a friend of mine has already received 184 men. They buried her yesterday, but it took 3 undertakers 36 hours to wipe the smile off her face, and 3 days to get her legs together to close the coffin.
Have Faith,
Liberated Woman
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