Pathetic

You're pathetic. Don't believe me? Ask your wife, she might tell you since she probably tells her friends what a dipsh*t you are.

China Earthquake

Authorities in Beijing have advised that the Earthquake felt by millions last night was nothing to worry about.
It was just the start of China's two-child policy.

Why Worry?

The next door neighbor of a middle-aged wife came over to inform her that her retired husband was chasing around after young prostitutes. The woman smiled, "So what?" The neighbor was surprised, "It doesn't bother you that he's running around with those women?" The woman replied, "I also have a little dog who chases cars and buses, too."