Falling In Love

An university student fell in love, and dropped out of school to marry her young love. She wrote to her parents to say that she had put the heart before the course.

Every Single Time

David: My wife beats me, doctor.
Doctor: Oh dear. How often?
David: Every time we play Scrabble!

Schmucks Get the Girls

Duncan was in his usual place in the morning, sitting at the table, reading the paper after breakfast. He came across an article about a beautiful actress that was about to marry a football player who was known primarily for his lack of IQ and common knowledge. He turned to his wife Sherry, with a look of question on his face. "I'll never understand why the biggest schmucks get the most attractive wives." His wife replies, "Why thank you, dear!"