Old Couple's Parts Inspection

One day an old man and his wife were sitting in their rockers. The old man reached over and grab his wife's breast and said, ''If these produced milk, we could get rid of the cow.'' Then he reached down and grabbed between her legs and said, ''If this was a little warmer, we wouldn't need the furnace.'' The old woman reached over and grabbed his dick and said, ''If this was a little harder, I wouldn't need your brother.''

Make Love

"Darling," she whispered after they had finished making love, "Will you still make love like that to me after we're married?"
He considered this for a moment, and then replied, "I think so. I've always been especially fond of married women."

The Honest Truth

A couple were celebrating 60 years of marriage and the man kissed his wife's neck and said, "Of our six kids the last one didn't look anything like his brothers and sister, did he have a different father?" After a moment she took a deep breath and answered yes. The old man sighed. "Who was he?" "You."