Uber Banking

Q: Is anything faster than electronic banking to move funds?
A: Yes, its called marriage.

Worried

"I'm worried," said the woman to her sex therapist. "I happened to find my daughter and the little boy next door both naked and examining each other's bodies." "That's not unusual," smiled the therapist. "I wouldn't worry about it." "But I am worried, doctor," insisted the woman, "and so is my daughter's husband!"

She Changed Me

"Ever since we got married, my wife has tried to change me. She got me to stop drinking, smoking and running around until all hours of the night. She taught me how to dress well, enjoy the fine arts, gourmet cooking, classical music, even how to invest in the stock market.," said the man. "Sounds like you may be bitter because she changed you so drastically,"remarked his friend. "I'm not bitter. Now that I'm so improved, she just isn't good enough for me."