Relationship Jokes

The List

My girlfriend asked me to name off all my sexual partners in order.
I probably should've stopped when I got to her name.

Anonymous

Painted Toilet Seat

A man decided to paint the toilet while his wife was away. His wife came home sooner than he expected, used the toilet, and got the seat stuck to her rear. Distraught, she asked her husband to unscrew the seat and drive her to the doctor. When they got to the doctor's office, the man lifted his wife's coat to show him their predicament. The man asked, "Doctor, have you ever seen anything like this before?" "Well, yes," the doctor replied, "but never framed."

Anonymous

Good News, Bad News, and Worse News

Good News: Your wife's not talking to you
Bad News: She wants a divorce
Worse News: She's a lawyer

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Anonymous
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