You Might Be a Redneck If... Always More

You might be a redneck if...

• Taking a dip has nothing to do with water.
• There are more than ten lawsuits currently pending against your dog.
• You take a fishing pole to Sea World.
• The hood and one door are a different color from the rest of your car.
• You've ever filled your deer tag on the golf course.
• You've ever shot somebody over a mall parking space.
• Santa Claus refuses to let your kids sit in his lap.
• Your toilet paper has page numbers on it.
• You think mud rasslin' should be an Olympic sport.
• The receptionist checks the rat traps at your place of business. 

You Might Be A Redneck If - 16

You might be a redneck if...

• You are still holding on to Confederate money because you think the South will rise again.
• You consider pork and beans to be a gourmet food.
• You can amuse yourself for more than an hour with a fly swatter.
• You have to go down to the creek to take a bath.
• You participate in the "who can spit tobacco the farthest contest".
• You roll you hair with soup cans and wash it once a year.
• You've never paid for a haircut.
• You consider a three piece suit to be: a pair of overalls, a plaid flannel shirt and thermal underwear.
• There is a sheet hanging in your closet and a gun rack hanging in your truck.
• You think the Mountain Men in Deliverance were just "misunderstood".

3 Statements If You're a Redneck

You might be a redneck if you can relate to the following statements:
1) "Nothing says lovin' like lovin’ your cousin!"
2) "Why go across town when you can go across the hall?"
3) "If you can't keep it in the pants then keep it in the family."