A Redneck Joke

1) If you go to your family reunion to pick up guys/women... You might be a Redneck.
2) If you have to bring  a can of paint to a water tower to defend your sister's honor... You might be a Redneck.
3) If you walk to school with your dad because you're in the same grade... You might be a Redneck.
4) If you smoke at your wedding... You might be a Redneck.
5) If your dog and wallet are both on a chain... You might be a Redneck.
And last but certainly not least,
6) If you see a sign that says "Say No to Crack" and it reminds you to pull your jeans up... You might be a Redneck.

Tennessee Walk

I was walking through Tennessee, and I came upon a cabin. There was a man sitting on the porch with a big bottle in front of him. He called over to me, "Hey boy, get over here." Pointing to the bottle, he asked, "You know what this is?" "I don't know." "It's moonshine you idiot. Why don't you take a drink?" "No thanks," I said. All of a sudden he pulled out a pistol and pointed it at me. "If you don't take a drink, I'll blow your balls off!" Terrified, I took a drink. It was the worst thing I ever tasted. It burned going down, I thought I was going to throw up. "Good stuff, aint it?" He said. Then he handed me the pistol. "Now you point that gun at me so I can take a drink."

Cowboy Boots And Shorts

You might be a redneck if you wear cowboy boots with shorts.