Blacks and Christmas Trees?

Q: What do blacks and Christmas trees have in common?
A: They both have colored balls.

Woman's Wish

A woman was walking along the beach when she stumbled upon a genie's lamp. She picked it up and rubbed it, and lo-and-behold a genie appeared. The genie said, "I can only grant you one wish. So ... what will it be?" The young woman pulled out a map of the middle east from her back pack. "See these countries, Egypt, Syria, Lebanon, Iran, Iraq, Palestine and Israel etc. Well I want them all to live in peace" she said. The Genie studied the map. "WTF lady, they've been fighting each other for hundreds of years, that's impossible, try another wish," the Genie grunted. Well said the young woman, "then I want a perfect man, one who is kind, compassionate, gentle who likes children and housework, loves to cook and will help clean the house even if the Super Bowl is on." The Genie stares at the young woman and finally says, "Show me that fucking map again."

Jump Out of the Plane

An Englishman, Frenchman, Mexican, and Texan were flying across country on a small plane when the pilot comes on the loud speaker and says, "We're having mechanical problems and the only way we can make it to the next airport is for 3 of you to open the door and jump. At least one of you will survive."  The four open the door and look out below.  The Englishman takes a deep breath and hollers, "God Save The Queen," and jumps.  The Frenchman gets really inspired and hollers, "Viva La France," and he also jumps.  This really pumps up the Texan so he hollers, "Remember the Alamo," and he grabs the Mexican and throws him out of the plane.