Job Interview

I went for a job interview and the manager said, "We're looking for someone who is responsible."
"Well I'm your man," I replied. "In my last job, whenever anything went wrong they said I was responsible."

That's Lazy

A site foreman had ten very lazy men working for him, so one day he decided to trick them into doing some work for a change. "I've got a really easy job today for the laziest one among you," he announced. "Will the laziest man please put his hand up." Nine hands went up.  "Why didn't you put your hand up?" he asked the tenth man. "Too much trouble," came the reply.

Mini-Skirt

My speech today will be like a mini-skirt. Long enough to cover the essentials but short enough to hold your attention!