Kilotons of Fun

I bet you're metric kilotons of fun.

Send in the Clowns Biology

To the tune of "Send in the Clowns"
So this is it, A few bases to go, I've tried and I've tried but the techniques's so slow. I've poured my gels, I've run quite a few. Full of bubbles, they leaked and why I never knew. But where are the clones? I've got to have clones, The end is so near. Is my broth rich? Does it look clear? Contamination is something I always fear. Are my plaques blue? They shouldnt be, No DNA left I'm down on my knees, So give me some clones? I've got to have clones, The end is so near. I've had bad preps, There've been quite a few, Ive tried all brands of PEG, fresh buffers, but nothing would do. And though they say, Solutions will keep, In my hands they last no more than a week. So send me some clones? I've got to have clones, The end is so near. I've read my gels, My eyes are quite sore, There's still sequence missing, of this I am sure. But there it is!! Finally done. I've conquered this fragment and now I have won. Whats's this I hear? A voice from the door. My supervisor wants 10kb more! So give me some clones, I've got to have clones, Or I'll be here all year! 

Economics Ruins Life

Economics is ruining your life when...
- I tried to calculate my 3 year old son's discount rate by seeing how many sweets he would require to be promised to him after dinner to be equivalent to one sweet before dinner. 
- I spent one hour in a toy shop making up over 20 bundles of toys that could be purchased for $25 and then asked my son to select one of these bundles.