An Eclipse

In a science class, the teacher asks her students what causes an eclipse. One student raises his hand and says, "It happens when the moon passes through the sun, causing an obstruction." "Very good observation," said the teacher, "any one else?" A young, blonde girl raises her hand and says, "Japan made this obstruction. They made this eclipse, which my dad drives everyday going to work," she quipped.

Magnet

Mr. Smythe had been giving his second-grade students a short lesson on science. He had explained about magnets and showed how they would pick up nails and other bits of iron. Now, it was question time... "Class," he said, "My name begins with the letter `M' and I pick up things.... What am I?" A little boy on the front row said, "You're a mother!"

Quantum in Bar

A quantum particle walks into two bars. In one, he has a few drinks, becomes the life of the party, gets lucky and has a splendid time. In the other he drinks too much, picks a fight with the wrong company and ends up beaten to half of his life.
The next day, he happens to meet an old buddy. After some very small talk, his friend asks, "Hey, so what did you do last night?"
The particle, bruised and beaten shouts, "DAMN IT MAN did you have to ask!!"