Whigs to Light a Lamp

Q: How many Whigs does it take to light an oil lamp?
A: One, and that person shall be President Andrew Jackson, hero of the Battle of New Orleans and Friend to the Common Man!

Doctors to Change a Lightbulb

Q: How many doctors does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Twenty: one primary care physician to change it and 19 specialists to take it apart and look at it under a microscope.

Emo's Changing Light Bulb

Q: How many Emo's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None, because they are all crying in the dark.