Even More Bumper Stickers!

• Heart Attacks... God's Revenge for Eating His Animal Friends
• How many roads must a man travel down before he admits he is lost?
• I'm an imbecile and I vote
• Money Isn't Everything... But it Sure Keeps the Kids In Touch
• If you can read this, I can slam on my brakes and sue you!
• 100,000 sperm and YOU were the fastest?
• Grow your own dope, plant a man
• All Men Are Animals, Some Just Make Better Pets
• Some people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them.
• I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
• BEER: It's not just for breakfast anymore.
• I need someone really bad...Are you really bad?
• Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
• All men are idiots...I married their king.
• Reality is a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs
• Don't drink and drive...You might hit a bump and spill it
• We are born naked, wet, and hungry....Then things get worse.

Conch Shell Insult

If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean.

Some Other Stupid Insults

• Running U.S. appliances on British current.
• Runs squares around the competition.
• Rusty springs in the mousetrap.
• S p a c e d o u t .
• Sailboat fuel for brains.
• Sat under the ozone hole too long.
• Sending back packets, but the checksums are wrong.
• Serving donuts on another planet.
• Settled some during shipping and handling.
• Seven seconds behind, and built to stay that way.
• Several nuts over fruitcake minimum.
• Several nuts short of a full pouch.
• Sharp, like stone in river.
• Swift, like tree through forest.
• She only packed half a sandwich.
• She only schedules zombie processes.
• She wears a pony tail to cover up the valve stem.
• She worries about the calories licking stamps and envelopes.
• She's a screensaver: Looks good, but useless.
• Short a few cards.
• Short-circuited between the earphones.
• Should be the poster child for family planning.
• Should have kept his helmet on while riding / playing.
• Single-sided, low density.
• Sitting in the right pew, but the wrong church.
• Skating on the wrong side of the ice.
• Skylight leaks a little.
• Slept too close to his radium-dial watch.
• Slinky's kinked.
• Sloppy as a soup sandwich.
• Slow as molasses in January.