Newspaper Clipping

• Washer. Owned by clean bachelor who seldom washed -- $100.
• Snow blower for sale. Only used on snowy days.
• Free puppies. Part German Shepherd, part dog.
• Cows, calves never bred. Also, one gay bull for sale.
• Free puppies: part Cocker Spaniel, part sneaky neighbor's dog.
• Full-sized mattress. 20-year warranty. Like new. Slight urine smell.
• Found: dirty white dog. Looks like a rat. Been out for a while. Better be reward.
• Nice parachute. Never opened. Used once. Slightly stained.
• Free Yorkshire Terrier. Eight years old. Unpleasant little dog.
• Tired of working for only $9.75 per hour? We offer profit sharing and flexible hours. Starting pay: $7 - $9 per hour.

Britney Spears Hired By Pepsi

Q: Why did Pepsi hire Britney Spears to do their commercial instead of Coke?
A: Because then would have had to change their slogan from "It's the real thing."

Media Ads

Why is it when you turn on the TV you see ads for telephone companies, and when you turn on the radio you hear ads for TV shows, and when you get put on the phone you hear a radio station?