Cremate Mother In Law

A person receives a telegram informing them about his mother-in-law's death. It also inquires him whether she should be buried or cremated. He replies, "Don't take chances. Burn the body and bury the ashes!"

Get Off of My Back

I just had the doctor remove an ugly growth from my back. It was my mother-in-law.

Mother-in-Law's Funeral

A husband and wife stepped up to view the body of his mother-in-law. As he began to cry, his wife punched him and said, "Why are you crying, you never liked my mother anyway."   "I know", he replied, "I thought I saw her move!".