WWII Spies

Three spies are arrested during WWII. One spy is French, one is Polish and the other is Italian. Their captors come into the cell and grab the French spy and tie his hands behind a chair in the next room. They torture him for 2 hours before he answers all questions and gives up all of his secrets. The captors throw the French spy back into the cell and grab the Polish spy. They tie his hands behind the chair as well and torture him for 4 hours before he tells them what they want to know. They throw him back into the cell and grab the Italian spy. They tie his hands behind the chair and begin torturing him. 4 hours go by and the Italian spy isn't talking then 8 hours, then 16 and after 24 hours they give up and throw him back into the cell. The Polish and French spies are impressed and ask him how he managed to not talk. The Italian spy responds, "I wanted to, but I couldn't move my hands!"

Polack Meets Priest

A Polack saw a priest walking down the street. Noticing his collar, he stopped him and said, "Excuse me, but why are you wearing your shirt backwards?" The priest laughed, "Because, my son, I am a Father!" The Polack scratched his head. "But I am a father too, and I don't wear my shirt backwards!" Again the priest laughed. "But I am a Father of thousands!" To which the Polack replied, "Well then you should wear your shorts backwards!"

Shift Change

At the Polish-Russian border, a Russian border patrol walks down the line, expecting a quiet evening when suddenly he sees something dangling from a tree. Someone hung himself. Right there. At the border. He calls his partner.
"Ivan? Come quick, there's someone hanging from the tree! Someone committed suicide right here at the border!"
"What? Oh please no! The paperwork! And in 30 minutes we'd be relieved and I want to go on vacation. C'mon, help me, we take him down and hang him over to the Polish side, let them deal with the guy!"
And they do. They cut down the corpse and carry it over a few yards past the border to tie him back up onto a Polish tree. Quickly they walk on and finish their patrol.
Not even an hour later, a Polish patrol comes along. The guard sees something dangle in the wind, he pauses, stares at it wide-eyed, and yells
"I can't believe it! Miroslav, come quick! He is back!"