What's On Your Back?

A German, an American, and a Mexican are traveling in the Amazon, and they get captured. The head of the tribe says to the German, "What do you want on your back for your whipping?" The German responds, "I will take oil!" So they put oil on his back, and a large Amazon whips him ten times. When he is finished the German has these huge welts on his back, and he can hardly move. The Amazons haul the German away, and say to the Mexican, "What do you want on your back?" "I will take nothing!" says the Mexican, and he stands there straight and takes his ten lashings without a single flinch. "What will you take on your back?" the Amazons ask the American. He responds, "I'll take the Mexican."

Mexican at the Border

A US Border Patrol Agent catches an illegal alien in the bushes right by the border fence, He pulls him out and says "Sorry, you know the law, you've got to go back across the border right now." The Mexican man pleads with them, "No, noooo Senior, I must stay in de USA!  Please!" The Border Patrol Agent thinks to himself,  "I'm going to make it hard for him"  and says "Ok, I'll let you stay if you can use 3 English words in a sentence". The Mexican man of course agrees. The Border Patrol Agent tells him, "The 3 words are: Green, Pink and Yellow. Now use them in 1 sentence." The Mexican man thinks really hard for about 2 minutes, then says, "Hmmm, Ok. The phone, it went Green, Green, Green, I Pink it up and sez Yellow?"

Jews in Mexico?

A German asks a Mexican if they have any Jews in Mexico. The Mexican replies, “Sí, we have orange jews, apple jews, and grape jews!”