Asian Bar

A 14 year old Chinese boy walks into a bar. He goes up to the the bar and signals the bartender, "I'll have a pint please." The bartender looks him up and down, laughs and says, "You're way too young!"
The boy replied, "How you know my name?"

Orwell

America read George Orwell's 1984 as a warning.
China read it as an instruction manual.

Asian Request

I asked my Chinese girlfriend for a 69 last night.
She said 'Fuck off, I'm not cooking at this time of night'