Vasoline in German

Q: What do you call Vasoline in German?
A: Vienerschlide.

Longest Organ in Sheep

Q: What is the longest organ in a sheep's body?
A: A New Zealander's cock!

Least Desirable Fortunes

The Top 10 Least Desirable Fortunes in a Fortune Cookie

1. We know where you live.
2. You will need good reading material in approximately 15 minutes.
3. Everyone's meal today is on you!
4. The "special sauce" came from the floor!
5. Guess what our special "drop" was in our Egg Drop Soup and win a free meal!!
6. Your colon will self destruct in five seconds.
7. A recent prison escapee that is sitting near by wants to love you long time.
8. Your dog Sparky...he's no longer missing.
9. See the waiter about our new food poison life insurance policies.
10. MSG? NO!! Ebola Virus....maybe