Patient at a Psychiatrist

This guy goes to a psychiatrist. The doctor shows him an inkblot and asks him what it looks like. "A naked woman." He shows him another inkblot and asks him the same question. "A naked woman on a bed." "You're a sick pervert!" the psychiatrist exclaims. "I'm not the pervert. You keep showing me all these filthy pictures!"

Drunk Vs Alcoholic?

Q: What's the difference between a drunk and an alcoholic?
A: A drunk doesn't have to go to those stupid meetings.

No Problem

A guy walks into his doctor and says, "Doc, you gotta help me, I can't remember anything!" The doc asks, "How long have you had this problem?" The guy says, "What problem?"