A New Tearful Bride

A new young blonde bride calls her mother in tears. She sobs, "Robert doesn't appreciate what I do for him." "Now, now," her mother comforted, "I am sure it was all just a misunderstanding." "No, mother, you don't understand. I bought a frozen turkey roll and he yelled and screamed at me about the price!" "Well, the nerve of that lousy cheapskate!" says her mom. "Those turkey rolls are only a few dollars." "No, mother it wasn't the price of the turkey, it was the airplane ticket." "Airplane ticket.... What did you need an airplane ticket for?" "Well mother, when I went to fix it, I looked at the directions on the package and it said - 'Prepare from a frozen state,' so I flew to Alaska!"

Blonde's Tricycle

Q: How do you recognize a blonde's tricycle?
A: It's the one with the kickstand.

Flight Attendant

A 777 was starting its descent and the pilot had forgotten to turn off the P.A. system. ''As soon as I clock off'' he said, ''I'm going to have a nice cold beer and then screw the arse off that blonde flight attendant.'' The horrified flight attendant made a dash toward the cockpit, but tripped over in the aisle. A little old lady sitting there whispered, ''There's no need to hurry love, he said he was going to have a beer first.''