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Bar Jokes
On the House
Q: Can you get free drinks by sleeping with the bartender?
A: It's worth a shot.
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Alien Abduction
Harry, Bill and Steve are sitting at the corner bar, when Ted walks in looking distressed. "Ted, you look awful. What's wrong?" Harry asks. Ted says, "Last night I got really drunk and I was abducted by an alien." Everyone is shocked. Bill asks, "What did the alien do to you?" "All I remember is being anally probed," Ted says.
Everyone is horrified. "I heard that they'll do that!" Steve says. "What did the alien look like?" Ted responds, "Karl."
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Yapucha Dance
A man was sitting at a bar in London, and ordered a drink. "So, who are you?", asked the bartender. "I'm a danceologist. I've studied every dance in the entirety of Europe". "Even the Wingo Wango?" "Mhm", he replied. "Even the Yapucha dance?", he asked.
"Wait, I've never heard of that one! Can you tell me about it?" The bartender shook his head. "I can't, but my cousin lives in Switzerland. Here's his address. The bartender handed him a business card. The danceologist thanked him, and booked a flight there. When he arrived at the airport, the cousin greeted the danceologist, and took him home.
"Every year on the 12th of May they do the dance. You see that mountain up there? They live on top. They'll be doing it in 2 weeks. The danceologist looked at the mountain in awe. Two weeks later, there was a heavy storm. Jagged rocks and the icy winds battered him. He didn't bring any oxygen, and so he felt too out of breath, and took a rest. Later, he carried on for one last push, and reached the top, where he met the tribe.
"Aha! Is this where the Yapucha dance is?", exclaimed the danceologist."Yes, you're just in time," laughed the chief. "Are we all ready?"
The other tribesmen got into a circle and nodded. The danceologist watched intently.
"Yapucha left foot in..."
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