House Directions

Q: There is a house. The front is facing south and the back is facing north. The right side is facing west and the left side is facing east. If a rooster lays an egg on top of the house which way will it roll?
A: No direction: roosters don't lay eggs.

The scene is a dark jungle in Africa...

The scene is a dark jungle in Africa. Two tigers are stalking through the brush when the one to the rear reaches out with his tongue and licks the ass of the tiger in front. The startled tiger turns around and says, "Hey! Cut it out, alright!"  The rear tiger says, "sorry,"  and they continue.  After about another five minutes, the rear tiger again reaches out with his tongue and licks the ass of the tiger in front. The front tiger turns around and cuffs the rear tiger and says,"I said stop it!"   The rear tiger says, "sorry," and they continue  .After about another five minutes, the rear tiger once more licks the ass of the tiger in front. The front tiger turns around and asks the rear tiger, "What is it with you, anyway?"  The rear tiger replies, "Well, I just ate a lawyer and I'm trying to get the taste out of my mouth!"

Squirrel Lays On Its Stomach

Q: Why did the squirrel lay on its stomach?
A: To keep its nuts warm.