Animal Jokes - Horse Jokes

Day After Christmas

It's the day after Christmas and young Johnny rides his new bike up to a stop light where a policeman on his horse is waiting for the light to change. The policeman looks over at Johnny and says, "Got that bike for Christmas, sonny?" The youngster responds, proudly, "Ya, Santa brought it for me." The policeman then proceeds to write the young fellow a bicycle violation ticket for not having a reflector on the back bumper and hands it to him saying, "Well, next time you better tell him to put a light on it." Johnny looks at the citation, looks back up at the cop and says, "And did Santa bring you that horse?" Humoring the youngster, the policeman answers, "Why, yes, he did." To which Johnny responds, "Well, next time you better tell him to put the dick underneath the horse, not on top."

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Anonymous

A Man's Horses

A guy walks into a bar looking frustrated. The bartender asks, "What's the matter?" The guy replies, "Well I've got these two horses and I can't tell them apart. I don't know if I'm mixing up riding times or even feeding them the right foods." The bartender suggests, "Why don't you try shaving the tail of one of the horses?" The guy says, "That sounds like a good idea, I think I'll try it." A few months later, he returns to the bar in worse condition. "I shaved the tail of one of the horses, but it grew back and I can't tell them apart again!" The bartender says, "Why don't you try shaving the mane?" A few months later the guy is back. "I shaved the mane of one of the horses, but it grew back!" The bartender yells, "Just measure the damn horses. Perhaps one is slightly taller that the other one!" The guy storms out of the bar. The next day, the guy runs into the bar. "It worked, it worked!" he exclaims. "I measured the horses, and the black one is two inches taller than the white one!"

Anonymous
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