Successful Night

After a night of drink, drugs and wild sex, John woke up to find himself next to a really ugly woman. That's when he realized he had made it home safely.

AB Answering Machine

A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we're not here. So leave a message.

Beer Belly

This asshole looked at my beer belly last night and sarcastically said, "Is that Corona or Bud?"
I said, "There's a tap underneath; taste it and find out."