Angry Drivers Meet

In a very small alley two trucks driving in opposite directions meet. As the drivers are equally stubborn, neither of them wants to reverse. They angrily look one at the other. Finally, one of them picks up a newspaper and starts reading. The other one politely asks, "When you've finished the paper, will you please bring it over, and let me read it?" 

Secret Identity

My secret identity? Mild-mannered porn star.

Need a Raise

I told my boss that three companies were after me and I needed a raise to stay at my current job. He asked which three were interested. I said the gas, electric and cable companies.