Jury Duty

A man chosen for jury duty very much wanted to be dismissed from serving. He tried every excuse, but none of them worked. On the first day, he decided to give it one more shot. As the trial was about to begin, he asked if he could approach the bench. "Your honor," he said, "I must be excused from this trial because I am prejudiced against the defendant. I took one look at the man in the blue suit, with those beady eyes and that dishonest face, and I said, "He's a crook! He's guilty, guilty, guilty." "So I could not possibly be on this jury." "Get back in the jury box," the judge replied. "You're just the kind of juror we are looking for --- a good judge of character. That man is his lawyer."

Reflex Check

My doctor friend is addicted to hitting people on their knees to test their reflexes.
He really gets a kick out of it.

To Be a Politician

I want to become a politician when I grow up so I've made a list of skills I want to acquire, but I've only come up with one: Lying.