Fulfilling Friend's Request

A dying man gives each of his best friends -- a lawyer, doctor and clergyman -- an envelope containing $25,000 in cash to be placed in his coffin. A week later the man dies and the friends each place an envelope in the coffin. Several months later, the clergyman confesses that he only put $10,000 in the envelope and sent the rest to a mission in South America. The doctor confesses that his envelope had only $8,000 because he donated to a medical charity. The lawyer is outraged, "I am the only one who kept my promise to our dying friend. I want you both to know that the envelope I placed in the coffin contained my own personal check for the entire $25,000."

Old Lawyers

Old Lawyers never die, they just lose their appeal.

Lawyers and Sperm

Q: What do a lawyer and a sperm have in common?
A: They both hope to be human someday.