Space Wizard

Q: What do you call a wizard from outer space?
A: A flying sorcerer!

iPhone Trouble

March was when my son celebrated his 15th birthday and I got him an iPhone. He just loved it. Who wouldn't?
I celebrated my birthday in July and my wife made me very happy when she bought me an iPad. 
My daughter's birthday was in August so I got her an iPod Touch.
September came by, so for my wife’s birthday I bought her an iRon.
It was around then that the fight started. What my wife failed to recognize is that the iRon can be integrated into the home network with the iWash, iCook and iClean. This unfortunately activated the iBitch.
Which led me to the iHospital and iGet out Thursday.

Two Aliens Talking

The first alien says, "The dominant life forms on the planet Earth have developed satellite-based nuclear weapons."
The second alien asks, "Are they an emerging intelligence?"
The first alien says, "I don't think so, they have them aimed at themselves"